Making better decisions

The art of feeling good for no reason

Making better decisions. Who wouldn't want to be able to do just that in a wide variety of contexts? Because we have to make decisions every single day. At work, in the family and in sport. Sometimes they are small ones, and sometimes really big ones. And there is actually a huge success factor that ensures that you are always able to make better decisions. Decisions to be able to meet. And it is precisely this success factor that I would like to introduce to you in this article.

I'm talking about the ability to feel good for no reason. Just like that. Not because something nice happens to you. Not because you are happy about another person's behavior. And not because you have a special sense of achievement. The vast majority of people are so conditioned to feeling bad that they have forgotten over time that feeling good should not only be the normal state, but that you can also actively bring it about. Would you like us to take a look at how this works?

Making better decisions - The common thread

Then I would like to invite you to take part in a little thought experiment. Think back to the three best and three worst decisions you made last year. Do you have the respective situations in your mind's eye? Very nice. What was the difference between the two categories? Although various factors naturally play a role, the most important one is always your emotional state, from which you make your decisions.

Because although we like to tell ourselves that we humans are rational beings who act logically and predictably without exception, the exact opposite is the case. Because we are a highly emotional species that makes all small and large everyday decisions exclusively on the basis of feelings, impulsive whims and inner needs.

What other reason would there be for some women to buy a Birkin bag for tens of thousands of euros, even though they already have dozens of handbags in their wardrobe? Why do modern urban cowboys absolutely need a huge SUV just to be able to drive their children to daycare 300 meters away? And what makes grown-up people undergo a body modification that consists of having an object planted under their forehead in the shape of a bagel (yes, this trend really existed)?^⁠

Our emotions determine the quality of our decisions

The cause is identical in all three examples: intense emotions. Because they make you feel unique, achieve a high status or receive recognition from outside. Of course, these people would never admit this, and if you were to ask them what drives them, they would firmly deny the influence of emotions and instead present you with a reason based on figures, data and facts. This is also known as post-rationalization.

And if you now think that something like this could never happen to you, then you are sadly mistaken. As different as we humans may be, we are united by the fact that we all make decisions based on our feelings. And we always do. As much as our character may be shaped by logic, in the end it is always our emotions that make us do or not do something.

Let us put it to the test. Have you ever bought something on a whim that you didn't really need? Have you ever let a supposedly good opportunity pass you by because your gut feeling told you not to? Or can you remember a situation in which you verbally threw something at a loved one that you regretted immediately afterwards?

Mix your own Brainjuice - and make better decisions

You know what I'm talking about, don't you? I'll go even further and say that you have never made a good decision from a negative state in your life. Fortunately, the exact opposite is also true. The more pronounced the heart and soul factor, the higher the quality of your decisions. What could be more obvious than taking responsibility for your emotional states and no longer leaving them to chance?.

The best way to do this? By taking a brief look at the limbic system of the brain. This is exclusively emotionally controlled and responsible for your feelings, your states and therefore also for decision-making. An ingenious metaphor for this comes from John LaValle (I met him at the NLP Trainers Training in 2008 and worked with him for several years. Today, I am quite critical of the Neuro Linguistic Programming method. But firstly, I was young and needed the money, and secondly, I still like to use some of the techniques today), who calls the biochemical cocktail created there „brain juice“, which can be translated somewhat clumsily as „brain juice“.

Together with water, this surrounds the thousands of synapses between which signals are sent every second via the famous data highways. The more connections you have between the individual memory locations, the easier it is for you to gain access to a wide variety of information. And the more frequently such a data highway is used, the broader it becomes and, over time, conditioning occurs, leading to the formation of unconscious automatisms. So far, so good? Wonderful.

The source of good decisions lies in the brain

The quality of brain juice is determined by neurotransmitters, the best-known representatives of which are adrenaline, dopamine, serotonin and the famous happiness hormone endorphin. And now the circle slowly closes, because the better your mood is, the more these neurotransmitters are released, which in turn lead to even better feelings. The more often this happens, the faster the corresponding data highways expand and new synapses are formed. And the limbic brain then makes high-quality decisions based on the various happiness hormones, which are reflected on the outside in heartbeat and corresponding results.

It is therefore worthwhile not leaving your condition to chance and consciously and regularly supplying your own personal brain juice with only the best messenger substances. However, you should not wait for the rare moments when this happens on its own. Instead, I recommend that you learn how to feel good at all times. Just like that. And for no reason at all. The better you are able to do this, the more successful you will be when it really matters.

Depending on the situation, you will of course need to be in different states. In a sales pitch, you need to be passionate and persuasive. Concentrated and focused in an exam. Motivated and full of energy when playing sport. Clear and committed in a negotiation. Empathetic and understanding in conversations with friends. Curious and open when learning. Passionate and captivating in a presentation.

Different situations require different conditions

As different as these individual states may be, they have one thing in common. The more intense the respective emotion is, the better you feel. And the better you feel, the better quality decisions you make. But unfortunately there is a small catch. Since you are not a machine, you are not always in an optimal state. Before the sales meeting, you feel under pressure. You are plagued by nervousness before an exam. You lack energy before an important competition. You feel insecure before a negotiation. You are impatient when talking to your best friend and suffer from stage fright before that all-important board presentation.

Wouldn't it be desirable if you could steer your condition in the desired direction by simple means in these situations? Then I would like to introduce you to one of my favorite mental techniques, which has served me and many of my clients faithfully for years. It consists of seven steps, the regular application of which will enable you to be in an optimal state in challenging situations.

Make better decisions: Mixing your Brain Juice in 7 steps

Ask yourself which state would be optimal for the situation at hand. At what moments in your life have you experienced this state particularly intensely? Let the memories become as vivid as possible so that you can experience the associated feeling intensely.
Immerse yourself in the situation and look at everything through your own eyes. What can you see? What can you hear? What smells and tastes do you perceive? And most important of all: How good do you feel? The more detailed your perception, the better.
Now concentrate on the good feeling. What shape and color does it have? (Yes, feelings really do have a shape and a color, feel free to put it to the test) Next, locate where exactly this feeling has its origin. In which direction does it move from there and in what way? Does it spin in circles, pulsate or radiate in waves?
Now intensify the movement and thus the good feeling. You will notice the following. The faster a feeling moves, the more intense it becomes. Increase the speed until you have reached the maximum intensity. And then? Well, then double the good feeling again. And again. Until your entire body is filled with a huge wave of feelings.
When this wave has reached its peak, associate this feeling with a specific movement (clench your fist, stretch your arms upwards, imitate the famous „Jürgen Klopp saw" etc.) or think of a personal password that you associate with this emotion and say it out loud several times. Performing the movement and saying the password can be done live for training purposes, but can also take place entirely in your imagination. Be aware of how the good feeling becomes even more intense with every movement and every password.
Now test your success by thinking about something completely different, such as filling in an Excel spreadsheet or sorting receipts for your annual tax return. Unless you happen to be an accounting fetishist, the good feeling should now be completely gone. Now make your move and say your password. The wave of feeling and the associated state will automatically fill your entire body again.
Finally, we want to generalize the state. To do this, think of 2-3 situations in your future in which you could use the feeling and the state particularly well. Make the movement, say your password and let yourself be surprised at what has changed.

The more often you train yourself to feel good, the better you will be able to control your moods. In situations where something is at stake, but also otherwise. And as soon as you are able to feel good for no reason at all, three things will happen.

The quality of your decisions increases dramatically.
Her work as Change Maker will be characterized by passion and dedication.
You banish mediocrity from your everyday life and enjoy an intense life in all respects that really deserves the name.

Could there be anything better? Hardly. And at the same time, you will be able to make better decisions.