The biggest obstacle to happiness, Success and satisfaction in life is the self-optimization mania. This phenomenon is the reason why a lot of open, innovative and positive people have great difficulty in actively shaping their future. Even though they have understood that Changes are as much a part of life as the air we breathe, and that a lack of mental growth inevitably leads to dreariness, dissatisfaction and frustration.
Do you also belong to this category? Then you may be struggling with a largely ignored problem. I'm talking about the tendency to want to change too much. Yes, you read that right. Even if Change is a wonderful thing, it is important, as always in life, to find the right balance. Or as the doctor puts it Paracelsus as early as the 15th century: „All things are poison, and nothing is without poison. Only the dose makes a thing not a poison.“
An end to the self-optimization mania
If you overdo it with the changes, this leads to a phenomenon known as self-optimization mania with a precision reminiscent of Swiss clockwork. The ever-increasing pressure to fight the status quo with all your might. And this is accompanied by an almost compulsive urge for supposed improvement, new stimuli and permanent restlessness.
The results of this state are even more dangerous than the well-known resistance to change. Driven by an inner dissatisfaction, you become your biggest critic, try out new ways at random and overdo it with the optimization of supposed weak points. Until the formerly positive approach turns into a self-reinforcing negative spiral characterized by fear, pressure and a tendency towards actionism. It doesn't matter whether something makes sense or not, the main thing is that something has changed.
Why the urge for self-optimization is so treacherous
But that is not enough. This process, which is both gradual and unconscious, inevitably leads to a lack of energy, permanent stress and excessive demands. And ultimately leads to you being much unhappier than all the vested interests, status quo defenders and those clinging to the past put together. And this despite doing everything on a conscious level to achieve the exact opposite.
Various empirical studies prove the negative effects of constant pressure to change on our psyche and general health, but common sense also suggests the same conclusion. Don't you know people who have simply overdone it with change over time? Who have changed their behavior, their communication, their Beliefs, have optimized their work processes and their supposed weaknesses for so long that they no longer have any rough edges because they are completely polished? In their self-optimization mania, these people have not even noticed that they have long since passed the tipping point at which their originally positive Changes have taken on a life of their own.
The tipping point of change
What do I mean by that? That fundamentally good qualities can become counterproductive or even destructive at a certain point. Let me give you a few examples. Would you agree that love is a beautiful thing? Okay, that was a rhetorical question. But what happens when you overdo it, when you love obsessively? Then this actually positive quality eventually leads to obsession and burdensome clinginess. Desirable thriftiness turns into stinginess if it is constantly exaggerated. Skepticism becomes paranoia. And openness can easily tip over into arbitrariness at some point. I could go on and on, but I think it's clear what I'm getting at, isn't it?
To illustrate the tipping point in the context of change, let's look at the typical daily routine of a fictional person who wants nothing more than to lead a successful and happy life. To make it a little more vivid, let's call this person Uwe, who recently quit his well-paid job as an IT administrator in a large corporation to follow his passion and start his own business. Uwe is not yet able to formulate exactly what his business model looks like, but he has a clear sense that it is the business of his heart.
An (almost) true story about the self-optimization mania
Driven by the popular messages on social media, the advice in books and the calendar sayings in relevant YouTube videos, Uwe has made it his mission not to leave his personal development to chance. That's why he gets up at 5 o'clock in the morning. Why is that? It's quite simple. Uwe is a member of the famous 5am Club. While others are still asleep, Uwe is already working on personal development. Even though he is actually a night person.
Tired and sleepy, he starts the day with an hour in the gym, where he prepares himself for the day with an intensive EMS workout and a new yoga technique. After a cold shower, a meditation session is on the agenda, followed by filling out the success journal. Uwe then has breakfast at 7 o'clock. However, as he tracks his calories precisely with an app, instead of bread rolls with Nutella he only has a Bullet Proof Coffee, because someone once told Uwe that this is the true breakfast for champions.
Hungry but determined, he then visualizes his Goals for the day, which he has written down using the SMART formula. However, as this alone is not enough, he supports the process with appropriate affirmations, which he recites in front of the mirror and concludes with his personal power pose. He has used the Eisenhower matrix to set his to-do list for the morning, and to ensure he is as productive as possible, he uses the Pomodoro technique to make the most of his limited time. During the few breaks he takes, he always finds inspiration on Instagram, where he follows the crème de la crème of the motivational industry, who regularly provide him with quotes that remind him how important it is to be an eagle and definitely not a chicken.
Uwe's stomach is starting to growl really loudly, because because he follows the philosophy of intermittent fasting, he is only allowed to eat solid food between 12 noon and 8 pm. But as winners know that carbohydrates make you tired, he enjoys a green smoothie from his three-week juice diet, which he has just bought for several hundred euros.
On his way to a networking appointment (he is always open to synergies), Uwe doesn't waste his time, but instead listens to a podcast by a guru he admires (at 2.7x speed, of course), who reminds him again and again that you will only get anywhere if you are prepared to go the extra mile. Since he still has some time before the appointment, he practices the Wim Hof breathing technique, which enables him to deal with his stressful everyday life as an entrepreneur in spe even more efficiently.
After an afternoon that was as exhausting as it was fruitless, Uwe doesn't call it a day, because he is an eagle after all. Instead, he logs into the weekly Inner Circle Call of his exclusive winner mastermind group, which is offered by his guru and of which he has recently become a member for an annual fee of just 35 thousand euros.
Uwe is now struggling to pay his rent on time, but the guru assured him that he would never get anywhere if he didn't invest in his personal development. After the meeting, he still has no idea how to make more money, but he has bought the coach's brand new online course, which was only available that evening at a special price of €2,999.
To round off the day, Uwe treats himself to a session with his brand new Mind Spa app before quickly reaching for his success diary shortly after midnight to summarize the day in writing. But he has to hurry, because in just a few hours it will be 5 a.m. again and the stress will start all over again.
The pressure for self-optimization is omnipresent
Yes, I admit that I have exaggerated some things to make things clearer. But doesn't all this sound a little familiar to you? Many people feel the same way as Uwe. Regardless of their current life situation. It affects the student just as much as the solopreneur, the manager, the sales representative or the single father. No wonder, because the world is turning faster and faster, and the pace, intensity and unpredictability of external changes and global crises have increased massively in recent years.
Algorithms determine our everyday lives, there is a suitable software for every problem today and a not exactly small number of jobs will be taken over by artificial intelligence or machines in the future. More and more people instinctively sense that we are at a decisive turning point in history. And this development has led to buzzwords such as Change management, transformation and personal development have become omnipresent. Because the realization has taken hold that you can either jump on the bandwagon of change or find yourself lonely and abandoned on the platform at some point.
I'm not a machine after all: Exaggerated self-optimization
This is where exaggerated self-optimization comes into play. As gratifying as it may seem at first glance that actively dealing with change is becoming an ever greater priority, the concrete results of these efforts are often fatal. This is because the traditional seminars, programs, training courses and books dedicated to the topic are all based on a fundamental premise: The way things have been done up to now is unfortunately no longer sufficient. What is needed are new ideas, new approaches and, above all, one thing: the development of one's own personality through continuous change.
But what do the subsequent efforts usually look like? Open any self-help book and you will always find the same messages communicated more or less subtly:
You are missing something.
You are not good enough.
You have an urgent need for optimization.
Models, techniques and tools are then proposed as solutions, all of which lead to a flawless, extraordinary and, above all, perfect future. And the promises sound quite tempting. Everyone can live their dream, have a well-paid job, be fit and healthy, have happy relationships, be financially secure and free from worries. If only, yes, if only you followed the experts' instructions perfectly and down to the last detail.
The treacherous messages of self-help books
Of course, the catch in this approach is immediately obvious. We humans are simply not perfect. We have our weaknesses, we are not always as disciplined as we would like to be and our Motivation is in the cellar from time to time. And when imperfect people strive for a perfect state, disaster is inevitable.
Triggered by the suggestions of the „You are missing something, you are not good enough and you are in urgent need of optimization“ you get caught up in self-optimization mania. You desperately try to reduce your own weak points. To fight the status quo with all your might. To rebuild your own personality. Leaving nothing to chance and controlling, monitoring and optimizing every single detail of your life. Driven by tools, methods and regular reminders of the need for optimization, you gradually develop into a human lab rat that is so busy trying to eliminate the supposed deficiency that at some point you lose sight of the actual reason why you started all this effort in the first place: To lead a fulfilled and contented life worthy of the name.
Out of the self-optimization mania - into balance
Hand on heart, with all the changes in your everyday life, the twenty-third professional change process in five years and the numerous crises that we have to deal with more and more frequently, haven't you already thought: „I've had enough now, I'm not a machine“? If so, I would like to invite you to say goodbye to the self-optimization mania, to give in to the Mindset revolution and embark on a completely new path as a change rebel.
I have set myself the goal of breaking this negative spiral and channeling the immense power of change back in a healthy and fulfilling direction. To convey a modern approach to change that meets the challenges of the present and succeeds in taking the future by the horns. Without coercion. Without pressure. But with the right balance of ease, fulfillment and the desire to shape your own life. I have explained exactly how to do this in my brand new book “The mindset revolution” described.
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